Healing for the Holidays

Part 34 in a series by Karen A. Stevenson, President, Studio K Salon

Here we are, nearing the end of the year.  Time to reflect on all that has been accomplished, all that has been learned, and things lost, in 2004.  Some of the year has been positive, some has been a struggle.  Funny how much can happen in the sum of 365 days. 

There are ups and downs with relationships, struggles at work financially, and certainly struggles with health.  Some have lost loved ones over the past year some have experienced new birth.  Moments of joy have surrounded us, as well as deepest sorrows. 

Life certainly is an experience, isn’t it?  There are times when it is easy to wish days, even weeks away, because of the hardships we are going through, and then there are times we wish time would stand still.

One thing is for sure.  If you haven’t experienced any growth, if you haven’t moved ‘forward’ in life, and gained increments of knowledge about life skills, those around you or about yourself, then this year didn’t account for much.

Isn’t it wonderful that the year isn’t over yet and you have one more chance to really make a difference in your life?  This holiday season when people that love you surround your table, why not take advantage of the moment?  When was the last time you told your family how much you loved them?  How much they mean to you?  How much they have impacted your life?  What about sharing the top three things you love about each person at the table?  Have you considered thanking the people for being in your life?  For caring? 

What about meditating on the situations of this past year that demanded growth as a person?  Did you experience things that forced you to exercise forgiveness?  Have you had to exercise grace to someone for his or her misdeeds?  Have you learned to be a more empathetic listener?  How to verbalize your needs and wants?  That relationship is more important than financial success?  Have you had to slow down your fast pace?  Learned patience?  How to melt your hardened heart?  Have you learned that boundaries are a healthy thing to have in tact?  How to share?  How to sacrifice?  How to give up a controlling behavior?  

There are many things our life teaches us if we pay attention to the lessons.  Sadly, if we don’t pay attention or pass the test of the current lesson, we will probably set ourselves up to have that lesson over and over again until we finally ‘get it’.   It’s easier to learn the lesson and move forward, than to ride the merry-go-round of same ol’ same ol’ and never going anywhere in life. 

So what is it you choose?  Have you chosen to make the best of 2004?  Have you built relationships?  Have you grown forward?  Are you entering 2005 with a clean slate and eager to take on the challenge of another 365 days of experience?  Have you warmed the hearts of those that love you?  Have you learned to say ‘no’ to the things you should be saying ‘no’ to?  Have you bridged the gap that should not be between you and a close friend or relative?  Have you written that thank you note?  Have you offered to help the person that you determined to help, yet kept forgetting?  Have you committed to physical exercise as you promised yourself you would?  Have you opened the closed doors to your heart?  Have you explained how you never meant to hurt the person you hurt by mistake?  Have you paid back the money you borrowed?

These are just a few of the examples of setting your own self free.   Things that come to mind may be exactly what you should do to grow and to move forward.  Remember, life is NOT all about self-absorption.  It is not about pleasing just yourself.  It certainly is not about selfishness and ignoring healing words and actions that would change lives of those around you.  Life is about memories, kindness, a job ‘well-done’, and loving care.  Closeness with those that stand by you.